Earn more than your husband? some ways to plan together

Today, with both couples earning in a marriage, it is more a marriage of equals. This does not mean a 50-50 contribution towards household expenses, children’s education, etc., but more a coming together of two individuals who earn together, spend together, plan together and live happily together.

There will invariably be one partner who earns more than the other. Traditionally, it has been the man who makes more than the wife. This has been the case because men have gotten more opportunities to study, pursue a career and grow. Now, with women taking hold of the reigns, the scale is slowly and steadily tipping in their favour. We are seeing more and more women making more money than their husbands. Kudos and more power to these women (and those who will take inspiration from them).

However, such a situation can get slightly tricky to manage. Money is, anyway, the number one bone of contention in a marriage, and when it is the woman who makes more, fragile egos and pride come into play. The only solution to this is open communication. It is imperative both partners understand that they are a team and not competing against each other. Moreover, they need to talk about what they want to achieve as a couple. Is it travel they desire? Do they want a comfortable retirement? Or do they wish for the best possible education for their children? Once their goals are aligned, they can then work together to achieve their shared vision.

Here are five conversations you should have to minimise friction and ensure things work seamlessly if you make more money than your husband.

Daily expenses

The first money conversation you will need to have with your husband is about your everyday expenses. This includes rent, groceries, utilities, fuel, school fees, and more. If he makes lesser than you, it is not fair to divide the expenses 50-50 as it will eat away the majority of his income. It is also not fair for you to handle all the expenses just because you make more, as it will not leave you with any disposable income to pursue your passions or use your hard-earned money as your desire.

What you can do

One way to handle this is to divide the daily expenses into your income ratio. Say, for example, you can take care of 65% of the expenditure, and he can pitch in for 35%. Alternatively, he can handle the majority of the expenses, and you can contribute towards other life goals that need systematic investing, namely an education fund for your child or a retirement fund in both of your names.

Personal expenses

This is basically using your money to treat yourself. For you, it could be shopping or taking a spa day. For your husband, it could be splurging on rare collectables or going out partying with the boys. To each its own! While this may not seem such a big deal, having the liberty to spend on yourself plays a huge factor in your overall happiness and well-being.

What you can do

Keep separate bank accounts. What each of you does with your money should not be anyone else’s concern. Remember, as long as they meet their financial commitments, it shouldn’t matter what they do with the rest of their money. It is quite evident that if they make lesser than you, they will treat themselves less frequently. So, if you want to make them happy, you can splurge on them on birthdays and other special occasions. After all, strong marriages rest on the foundation of love, care and empathy. 

Loans

One or both parties may come into the marriage with loans. It could be student loans or personal loans. You can also take up loans together to buy a house or a car. It is important to have an honest conversation about how to repay these loans, especially if there are previous loans, as they can become a burden on the other partner.

What you can do
 

In an ideal situation, if your partner has more debt than you, then they should pay it off independently. Alternatively, if they are open to you helping out and you are willing to do the same, you can pay off a small percentage of that debt every month. Another way to tackle this is that you contribute larger amounts towards loans that you have taken together such as a home loan, and they take on a lesser responsibility of the joint loan while prioritising repayment of personal debt. 

Life goals

This includes both short-term and long-term goals. For example, your short-term goal is to travel as much as you can, and for him, it is to own a nice car. Similarly, you both have a long-term goal of buying your dream home or creating a sizeable corpus for your golden years. With unequal incomes, how do you meet your goals?

What you can do
 

Both can work towards them with individual short-term goals, but the chunk of contribution can differ. For instance, when you make travel plans which is your goal, you can spend on all the big things such as tickets and hotel stays, while your husband can pay for food and entertainment. With long-term goals such as buying a home, you can start saving for a down payment while he can contribute towards the EMI. With a retirement fund, you make lump sum investments like annuity purchases, while he can pay towards gradually building a corpus through mutual fund SIPs. You can create a joint account to work towards your life goals.

Tying It up
 

Ensure you have individual bank accounts for managing personal expenses and liabilities. Also, create a joint account to consolidate investments and acquire assets. You can open bank accounts with IDFC FIRST Bank for all your individual and combined needs. With a plethora of banking and investment options, IDFC FIRST Bank can make managing your money and building towards your future as a couple seamless.

Disclaimer

The contents of this article/infographic/picture/video are meant solely for information purposes. The contents are generic in nature and for informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for specific advice in your own circumstances. The information is subject to updation, completion, revision, verification and amendment and the same may change materially. The information is not intended for distribution or use by any person in any jurisdiction where such distribution or use would be contrary to law or regulation or would subject IDFC FIRST Bank or its affiliates to any licensing or registration requirements. IDFC FIRST Bank shall not be responsible for any direct/indirect loss or liability incurred by the reader for taking any financial decisions based on the contents and information mentioned. Please consult your financial advisor before making any financial decision.